Obstacles and how we use them

One strange problem is the irrational human belief that we shouldn’t have any.  Not only “should” we, but it’s almost impossible to make any significant growth without them.  Be grateful for them and use them, don’t curse them.

Ask “What’s great about this?”, “How will I use this?” or “How will I handle this next time?”.  Never ask “Why does this always happen to me?” or similar questions, where even the subliminal answers are destructive.

Ryan Haliday explores this concept in depth in his incredible book: “The Obstacle is the Way” with dozens of examples of those who created amazing lives for themselves and others because of the problems they faced, not in spite of them.

“If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.” – Frank A. Smith

A reason for hope

It’s difficult to perceive progress in ourselves or our community when the most prominent “news” seems to reveal that our health, wealth, our governments, and interpersonal relationships are getting worse.

Violence has been on a continuous decline for 5,000 years.  A mere 200 years ago, 94% of the world’s population lived in extreme poverty, and now that number is less than 10%. (From Steven Pinker’s The Better Angels of our Nature).

Zooming out to see the big picture, and consciously monitoring the amount and type of “news” you consume, can help you perceive your own progress.  Perhaps you’ll even be grateful to be living in what is by far the best time in human history for just about every metric that matters.  Lucky us.

More effective than rules

Texting and driving is dangerous, so I made a rule to never to do so unless the car was in park.  To cut back on carbs and sugar, I gave myself a daily consumption quota.  Rules like this are helpful only if you’re disciplined enough to police yourself.  But…

Changing my phone settings so that texts don’t display at all before I drive makes compliance easy.  Not allowing carbs or sugar in my house cancels the need for self-control.  You can rely on willpower to NOT hit snooze, or you can position your alarm clock so you have to get up to turn it off.

Discipline is essential of course, but you can improve outcomes for following rules when if you minimize or eliminate the option to break them.