The Communication Skill Schools Forgot

There are four ways to communicate: reading, writing, speaking, and listening.

School teaches us three.

Listening may be the most important skill in human relationships, yet few of us have learned how to do it well. During listening exercises in my keynotes, participants are often surprised by how unfamiliar genuine listening feels.

Here is one simple practice. When someone calls to vent, ask:

“Before you continue, would you like my advice, or would you prefer that I simply listen?”

The question may catch them off guard because they may not know the answer themselves.

But it communicates something powerful: I’m not here to impose what I think you need. I’m here to understand what you need.

Are You Living On Default Settings?

The length of a meeting doesn’t need to match your calendar’s default setting.

An hour isn’t automatically better than 30 minutes. A meeting isn’t always better than an email. And the way something has always been done isn’t necessarily the way it should continue.

Defaults are useful. They save us from making endless decisions. But they can also quietly make decisions for us. Every once in a while it's worth asking if your default could use an update.

Your Reputation is Your Brand

Your Reputation is Your Brand

You show up as a "brand" the second you engage with someone. Your brand is your reputation, which is a promise others learn to expect from you.

When your product is shipped to their door. When your music shows up in their headphones. When you meet your new boss. When you are asked for advice.

Intentional or not, the promise is there. Better to be intentional, and consciously say: people like me do things like this. The best time to work on it is 5 years ago. The next best time is now.