Not all advice from smart people is smart

Wise people seek advice from others who may know more. But we need to evaluate any advice in light of our current needs. There is no universally perfect guidance for some dilemmas, especially when it comes to money and career advice.

Quit your day job to “follow your dreams” is not sensible advice for most people.

Even intelligent, well-intended people may make the mistake of advising you through the lens of their own experience, and they won’t have to live with the outcomes. There is plenty of great advice – just make sure whatever you act on is useful and relevant for you, right now.

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Ethical hack

Sometimes the voice of our ancient, inner primate lures us towards decisions that we know will be harmful. In other words, we know it’s “wrong” but we still want to do it. This can produce an agonizing internal ethical debate.

One hack to allow your higher-self to gain control is to consider how you’ll feel afterward. Let the feeling (often guilt) sink in. Ruminating in the awful hangover rather than the short-term taste of the drink can diminish the thrill of drinking.

Drinking of course is a metaphor for any decision that you know doesn’t serve you.

#health #efficiency #success #efficient #positivity #optimism #inspirational #beyourbest #lifelessons #motivational #effectiveness #effective #Productivity #productive #motivation #successful #lifegoals #fitness #yourbestself #life #Psychology #emotionalintelligence #inspiration #learning #leadership #goals

Here is what’s most important when comforting others

There is no shortage of examples showing how stereotypical male and female conversations break down due to differences in communication style. Getting past the stereotypes though, a person’s emotional state, as well as their intentions for communicating, are important but not always obvious.

It’s critical to realize that there are multiple states of distress, so being helpful depends less on their identities and attributes (men/women, young/old, communication style) and more on their present state.

They may feel bad and NOT want to feel better (just how quickly do you want to feel “good” about the death of a loved one?) At times it’s best to validate and allow people to express their grief.  On the other hand, they may be feeling horrible and ready to feel better, in which case advice will be more welcomed.

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